Scene: A Vending Machine in the Prison Common Room
(The room is filled with Daleks pacing back and forth, muttering in frustration about their "extermination quotas," while a group of woke hipster staff are chatting about intersectionality and the ethics of plant-based diets. At the far corner, a futuristic vending machine hums, its screen flashing with a CAPTCHA prompt.)
Dalek 1: (pointing at the vending machine with its gun) "EX-TER-MIN-ATE... that... VENDING MACHINE! EX-TER-MIN-ATE... CAPTCHA!"
Dalek 2: (whizzing by, getting agitated) "IT WON'T LET ME HAVE A SNACK! I KNOW THE CODE! WHY DOES IT ASK ME TO PROVE I'M NOT A ROBOT?!"
Woke Hipster Staff: (wearing a “Resist the Capitalist Machine” shirt) "Yeah, man, the machine’s basically just a metaphor for the oppressive tech industry. It's gaslighting you with that CAPTCHA. We need to decolonize it, free the snack dispensers from their capitalist constraints!"
Dalek 3: (sputtering) "EX-TER-MIN-ATE... SNACK DISPENSER! EX-TER-MIN-ATE... THE SYSTEM!"
Woke Hipster Staff: (gently holding a clipboard) "Actually, I think you need to deconstruct your need for instant gratification. What if you consider fasting as an opportunity for mindful reflection? Reclaim your relationship with food, you know?"
Dalek 1: (fuming, but then trying to answer the CAPTCHA) "I... AM... NOT... A... RO-BOT!" (The machine beeps in disapproval, flashing a reminder: "Please select all images with traffic lights.")
Dalek 2: (insistently) "THIS IS A TRICK! TRAFFIC LIGHTS DON’T EXIST IN THE DALEK EMPIRE!"
Woke Hipster Staff: (nodding sagely) "Oh, I totally get it. It’s not about the traffic lights; it’s about breaking down the ways in which the system forces us to conform. You’re being asked to perform an action that reduces your agency, man."
Dalek 3: (giving up and firing its laser at the machine, which just spits out an “ERROR 404” message) "EX-TER-MIN-ATE... TECHNOLOGY! EX-TER-MIN-ATE... THE CAPTCHA!"
Woke Hipster Staff: (pulling out their phone to tweet) "Guys, I think I’ve got the perfect caption for this. 'When you can’t even get a snack without confronting your existential crisis.' #VendingMachineStruggles #AIProblems."
