Hearing of California’s bold move, the New England states—led by Vermont, Massachusetts, and Maine—hold an emergency meeting at a historic colonial tavern. The setting is hilariously theatrical, with representatives dressed in 18th-century garb and speaking in mock Revolutionary-era accents for dramatic flair.
The movement, called "NewLiberty," spreads like wildfire. New Englanders argue that if California can leave, why not the land of the Pilgrims? Their slogan: "Live Free or Leave!"
The campaign is spearheaded by Bernie Sanders, who declares:
“We’ve got maple syrup, brilliant foliage, and more cranberries than anyone needs. We don’t need Washington!”
As the secession fever rises, other regions of the U.S. begin to consider their own exits. Texas revisits its perennial "Texit" dreams, causing chaos. Meanwhile, New York City proposes becoming an independent city-state, branding itself "Big Apple Republic."
President Trump is overwhelmed and resorts to bizarre tactics, such as suggesting a reality TV competition where states vote on which ones get to leave. He tweets:
“NEW ENGLAND STATES THINK THEY CAN LEAVE? GOOD LUCK WITHOUT ME!!! BETTER STICK WITH THE WINNER—ME!”
Back in New England, the final straw comes when Trump insists that clam chowder should be renamed "Trump Stew." Incensed, Maine deploys its lobster fishermen to blockade the White House with crates of live lobsters, while Boston holds "freedom marches" featuring life-sized Paul Revere mascots.
The entire debacle ends in absurdity as the U.S. Congress tries to vote on a solution, only to find half its members are secretly applying for dual citizenship in Vermont.
