The Ignorance Rally: The Spectacle of Simplicity
The rally takes place in a sports arena filled with screaming fans wearing hats emblazoned with “Think Small, Act Big!” A banner unfurls, showing a globe with “Flat Earth, Great Nation” scrawled across it.
Trump takes the stage: “Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the greatest rally in the history of thoughtlessness! Today, we celebrate you—the real Americans who know that thinking is overrated!”
Key highlights:
- Banana Voting Machines: Guests use bananas instead of ballots to vote on “The Dumbest State in America”. Florida wins in a landslide.
- Ignorance Quiz Show: Contestants compete to answer the least accurate questions, with answers like “George Washington invented TikTok” earning raucous cheers.
- Trump’s Ignorance Anthem: A reworked America the Beautiful sings, “From sea to shining duh!”
Trump finishes with: “Knowledge is for losers. Let’s keep America great—one dumb decision at a time!” The crowd erupts into chants of “U-S-A! Think no way!”
