Title: "Elon's Grand Vision: Stage 3 – Full Optimisation"
Scene: The third meeting takes place in a futuristic conference room Musk has designed to “optimise productivity.” The walls are a disorienting maze of mirrored panels, and the chairs look like minimalist torture devices. Trump, unbothered, sits in a gold-plated throne he brought himself, sipping a Diet Coke. Musk, laser-focused, stands beside a massive hologram labelled “Stage 3: Full Optimisation.”
Musk (clicking a button on his tablet as the hologram zooms in on a map of Earth, covered in grids):
Mr. President, welcome to the final stage of our plan: Full Optimisation. This is where we revolutionise civilisation itself.
Trump (nodding sagely):
Revolution! I love revolutions. My ratings? Revolutionary. The Apprentice? Revolutionary. This? Going to be huge. So what are we optimising? And can we name it after me?
Musk (smiling thinly):
Naturally, Mr. President. Optimisation is all-encompassing. We’ll standardise not just cities, but humans themselves. Every citizen will be... enhanced. Stronger. Smarter. More efficient.
The hologram shifts to show humanoid figures with identical faces, all vaguely resembling Elon Musk, marching in unison.
Trump (leaning forward, intrigued):
Enhanced humans? Like superheroes? Love it. People always say I’m like a superhero. So everyone gets superpowers? Tremendous.
Musk (hesitating briefly):
Not... superpowers, per se. More like upgrades. Emotions, for example, are inefficient. They’ll be... removed. Citizens will operate solely on logic and productivity.
Trump (grinning):
No emotions? I love it. Emotions are overrated. Except for love. People love me. Can we keep that one?
Musk (typing on his tablet):
Of course. Love for the state—love for you—will be mandatory. The next step involves streamlining the population. We’ll assign everyone specific roles based on their genetic potential. No more wasted talent or inefficiency.
Trump (applauding):
Assigning roles! Like The Apprentice! You know, I was the best at assigning roles. You're fired, you’re hired. Great system. But let’s make sure I’m the one doing the assigning. People trust me with these decisions.
Musk clicks another button, and the hologram changes to show vast fields of identical domed cities, labelled "Optimisation Zones." Each city is surrounded by heavily patrolled borders.
Musk:
We’ll also relocate non-optimal individuals to specialised zones. They’ll receive remedial training—learning how to contribute effectively. No one is left behind.
Trump (pointing at the map):
Zones! Perfect. Call them Trump Camps. Very classy. And make sure they have golf courses. We can’t have a world without golf. That would be chaos.
Musk (barely suppressing a smirk):
Naturally, Mr. President. Recreation is an essential part of efficiency.
The hologram now shows a shiny black-and-white flag with a large “T” in the centre. Musk gestures dramatically.
Musk:
Under this unified system, the world will achieve unprecedented order. One language. One currency. One leader.
Trump (grinning widely):
One leader? I like where this is going. Tremendous idea. But make sure the flag has gold. People love gold. Especially on me.
Musk clicks another button, revealing a new hologram: a massive factory filled with identical drones assembling more identical drones.
Musk:
To maintain this system, we’ll need automated enforcers. Machines that are incorruptible, efficient, and unwavering. These enforcers will ensure absolute compliance.
Trump (looking uneasy for the first time):
Machines? I don’t know, Elon. Machines can turn on you. Like those voting machines in Georgia.
Musk (calmly):
These machines will be loyal to you, Mr. President. They’ll even wear red hats.
Trump (relieved):
Red hats! Now we’re talking. Make them chant my name, too. People love a good chant.
A knock at the door interrupts the meeting. An aide rushes in, holding a stack of newspapers.
Aide (nervously):
Mr. President, there’s been some... uh... concern about the optics of these plans. People are comparing them to, uh... well... certain regimes from history.
Trump (waving him off):
Fake news. People love my ideas. They’re revolutionary. Tremendous. Right, Elon?
Musk (grinning):
Absolutely, Mr. President. This isn’t history repeating itself. This is history upgrading itself.
Trump (nodding decisively):
Upgrading history! I like that. Sounds very futuristic. Just make sure the historians write nice things about me.
Musk gestures to the hologram one last time, where the words “Phase 4: The Final Upgrade” briefly flicker before disappearing.
Trump (pointing at the screen):
What’s Phase 4?
Musk (smiling cryptically):
We’ll get to that soon, Mr. President. Very soon.
As the meeting concludes, Trump stands, clapping Musk on the back.
Trump:
You’re a genius, Elon. Together, we’re going to Make History Great Again. And then upgrade it. Tremendous!
The scene ends with Musk tapping furiously on his tablet, a faintly ominous hum filling the room as the words “Initiating Phase 4” flash on the screen.
