Scene: Shoreditch Café – "Riddles and Rebellion"
A dimly lit café with exposed brick walls, mismatched furniture, and a chalkboard menu featuring items like "Deconstructed Vegan Latte" and "Postmodern Avocado Toast." The Woke Hipster, dressed in a thrifted ensemble and sipping an oat milk matcha, sits across from the Riddler, a cloaked enigma with a penchant for cryptic conversation.
Woke Hipster:
[Snapping fingers for emphasis]
"So, like, oppression isn’t just systemic, you know? It’s linguistic. Language itself is colonised by capitalism. That’s why I refuse to use full stops—it’s just punctuation hegemony."
Riddler:
"What speaks in rebellion but says little in truth? What forms a question but offers no proof?"
Woke Hipster:
[Pausing dramatically, then clapping once]
"Whoa. Deep. Are you, like, deconstructing my praxis right now? Because praxis isn’t just what you do; it’s how you live your authenticity."
Riddler:
"What is authentic but fleeting, real but abstract? A statement proclaimed, or a feeling refract?"
Woke Hipster:
[Leaning back, squinting]
"Okay, I see what you’re doing. You’re problematising authenticity by exposing it as a performative construct. Respect. But also, like, isn’t your whole riddling thing kinda gatekeeping knowledge? Aren’t you perpetuating epistemic violence?"
Riddler:
"Violence unseen but felt in the mind; Is it the speaker, or hearer confined?"
Woke Hipster:
[Snapping fingers wildly]
"Yes! That’s it! We’re all confined by the structures of power, man. But like, we can break free if we disrupt the meta-narratives. Have you tried micro-dosing? It’s life-changing."
Riddler:
"What is the dose that opens the door? What is the drug that makes one… more?"
Woke Hipster:
[Sipping matcha, nodding enthusiastically]
"More woke, more connected, more revolutionary, obviously. But you can’t just, like, consume it, you know? You have to embody it. Otherwise, it’s just spiritual gentrification."
Riddler:
"What is gentrified but altered anew? What is reclaimed but painted askew?"
Woke Hipster:
[Stroking their moustache thoughtfully]
"Man, you’re really making me interrogate my positionality here. Like, am I an ally, or am I just a part of the problem I critique? Also, do you want to share my sourdough? It’s ethically foraged."
Riddler:
"What is bread but the labour of hands? What is shared but still held by demands?"
Woke Hipster:
[Sitting bolt upright, eyes wide]
"Wow. Capitalism has even colonised my carbs. You’ve blown my mind, dude. But, like, in a non-violent way. We should collab. Have you ever considered writing riddles for activist zines?"
Title: Riddled Woke: The Paradox of Positionality
A tale of mutual bewilderment over kombucha and contradictions.
