Dalek Trust Fall Exercise – A Catastrophe in Three Acts
Scene: A sterile community centre. A circle of Daleks sit in a support group, their eye stalks swivelling awkwardly. At the front stands a well-meaning human therapist, Dr. Linda Thompson, trying to teach them basic social skills.
Dr. Thompson: “Alright, everyone, today we’re going to work on trust—a crucial component of integrating into human society! We’ll start with a simple trust fall exercise.”
Dalek Greg: “EXPLAIN! EXPLAIN!”
Dr. Thompson: “One Dalek will stand in front, close their eye stalk, and let themselves fall backward, trusting the others to catch them.”
Dalek Kevin: “TRUST IS IRRATIONAL! DALEKS DO NOT TRUST! DALEKS OBEY!”
Dr. Thompson: “And that’s exactly why we need to work on this! Who wants to go first?”
(A long, awkward silence. Dalek Steve reluctantly rolls forward.)
Dalek Steve: “I WILL DEMONSTRATE.”
(Dr. Thompson claps encouragingly. Dalek Steve turns around, his plunger trembling slightly. The other Daleks line up behind him.)
Dr. Thompson: “Okay, Steve, on three… ONE… TWO…”
(Dalek Steve lets himself fall. The Daleks behind him immediately panic.)
Dalek Kevin: “INCOMING HOSTILE! DEFENSIVE ACTION REQUIRED!”
Dalek Greg: “EXTERMINATE!!!”
(ZAP! Dalek Steve is instantly vaporised.)
(A long, awkward silence. A small pile of dust settles where Dalek Steve once stood.)
Dr. Thompson: “…Oh dear.”
Dalek Kevin: “TRUST FALL UNSUCCESSFUL.”
Dalek Greg: “SUGGESTION: MODIFY EXERCISE. REPLACE ‘TRUST’ WITH ‘OBLITERATE THREATS’.”
(Dr. Thompson rubs her temples.)
Dr. Thompson: “…Let’s just move on to empathy exercises.”
(The Daleks immediately prepare to EXTERMINATE empathy.)