(We now find Cathy in a local community sustainability meeting, where everyone is so deeply committed to eco-friendly solutions that they practically worship at the altar of every new trend. But Cathy? She’s just here to see what absurdities will unfold.)
Forum Organiser (with a soft, spiritual air):
“I believe we all need to consider the holistic impact of our choices on the environment. We should adopt a zero-waste lifestyle immediately, starting with eliminating all plastic—every single piece.”
Cathy (nodding enthusiastically, but with that classic sarcastic gleam):
“Absolutely, zero waste! We’ll all just... live in the woods, foraging for berries and wearing garments made entirely out of recycled string. Nothing says ‘saving the earth’ like a solid commitment to personal inconvenience. I can already feel my carbon footprint shrinking just by thinking about it.”
Another Attendee (eager to agree, while missing the sarcasm):
“Exactly! That’s the spirit! Think of the impact we can have if we all just start living with less! Less everything, all the time!”
Cathy (grinning as she pats her reusable coffee cup):
“Oh, less everything. I absolutely love that idea. Who needs excess things like, say, food or electricity? We could all just sit around in the dark, sipping water from glass jars, while the earth gives us a slow, silent round of applause. I’m all in for that lifestyle.”
Forum Organizer (completely serious, her voice almost mystical):
“Exactly! And we’ll start by reducing our use of plastic straws. If we each give up just one single-use item a day, we could reverse global warming!”
Cathy (with a sweet smile):
“Oh yes. One straw at a time. I’m sure the glaciers will start reforming just from the sheer dedication we’ll put into this. After all, how could nature resist the power of our paper straws? I mean, who needs things like real systemic change when we can just get rid of plastic straws and pat ourselves on the back?”
Another Attendee (nodding vigorously):
“That’s right! We just need to start small and make a personal commitment to change!”
Cathy (her tone sugar-sweet, her sarcasm utterly unnoticeable to them):
“Of course! Personal commitment is key. If we all just give up a single plastic straw a day, I’m sure the earth will turn around, and we’ll all live in a glorious eco-utopia. It’s really the only solution to the world’s problems, after all.”
Once again, Cathy masterfully manages to slip her sarcastic remarks under the radar, all the while watching the crowd enthusiastically agree with every word. They’re too busy patting themselves on the back for their “environmental efforts” to notice she’s poking holes in their impractical ideas with every comment.
