Scene: The Brunch Revelation Outreach
Sandra and her newly united Fellowship begin spreading the Gospel of Brunch across the land. They draft a manifesto filled with slogans like:
- “The Universe is Sunny Side Up!”
- “Curved Croissants, Flat Pancakes: Unity in Breakfast!”
- “Mimosas Are the Elixir of Truth!”
Barry spearheads their branding efforts, creating pamphlets that combine breakfast imagery with diagrams of sacred geometries, such as the Golden Ratio hidden in a perfectly buttered crumpet.
They set up a Brunch Revival Tent in the car park of a big-box store. Their services feature pancake juggling, waffle hymns, and a ceremonial “syrup anointing” performed by Sandra.
Scene: The Omelette Rift
Tensions begin brewing within the Fellowship when a rogue faction, The Scrambled Truthers, challenges Sandra’s leadership.
This causes a schism at a potluck dinner when Barry is caught eating a frittata.
Scene: The Quest for the Sacred Toast
To strengthen their doctrine, Sandra announces a pilgrimage to find the Sacred Toast, which she claims is an ancient artefact that holds the power to settle all brunch disputes.
Armed with butter knives and a map scribbled on a napkin, the group embarks on their journey.
Highlights include:
- Discovering “divine bread” in a bakery, only to realise it’s gluten-free and therefore ineligible for sacred status.
- Getting thrown out of a farmer’s market for attempting to weigh a loaf of sourdough “to measure the density of truth.”
- Sandra claiming she saw the face of the universe in a piece of toast that burned in the shape of a perfect circle—but Barry insists it’s just a bagel with illusions of grandeur.
Scene: The Final Revelation
Their journey culminates at a mysterious diner in the middle of nowhere, where an elderly waitress named Marge serves them a plate of unassuming toast.
The group bows their heads as Sandra lifts a single slice and bites into it. Her eyes widen.
Suddenly, the diner begins to shake. The walls glow with a golden light. Marge takes off her hairnet, revealing a halo of syrupy radiance.
Sandra falls to her knees, sobbing.
The light fades, and the group finds themselves back in the van, holding a single slice of toast.
Epilogue: The Brunch Wars
The Fellowship returns to their community, now reinvigorated with divine purpose. They erect a Temple of Brunch, complete with a golden griddle altar and stained-glass windows depicting waffles, pancakes, and bacon strips.
But their peace is short-lived. The Scrambled Truthers have built their own temple across the street, shaped like a giant egg.
The Fellowship retaliates by hosting The Great Brunch-Off, a cook-off judged by neutral diners to determine the ultimate breakfast truth. Chaos ensues as rival factions sabotage each other’s batter and throw sausage links like javelins.
In the end, Sandra stands atop the griddle altar, holding the Sacred Toast aloft.
The crowd falls silent. Slowly, they begin to nod, united once more under the banner of brunch enlightenment.
