EXT. SPACEPORT - DAY
The scene opens on a sleek, futuristic spaceport. The sun shines down, and a crowd has gathered for what’s being billed as the most innovative space launch of the century. A large stage has been set up for a press event. At the centre, there’s a peculiar sight: an enormous rocket shaped suspiciously like a block of cheese, complete with holes. The crowd murmurs in confusion and excitement. A banner above reads: “ELON THE MUSKRAT PRESENTS: THE FUTURE OF SPACE TRAVEL.”
At the podium stands ELON THE MUSKRAT, wearing a space suit that’s far too large for his furry, rodent-like body. His oversized helmet is perched on his head at a jaunty angle, and he’s smiling with that infuriating mix of self-assurance and smugness.
The crowd falls silent, unsure how to react. Some chuckle nervously, others exchange perplexed glances. Elon doesn’t notice, as he continues enthusiastically.
Elon dramatically points at the rocket, which gleams in the sunlight, its cheesy exterior shining brilliantly.
The crowd stirs with a mix of curiosity and skepticism. A journalist raises their hand, looking concerned.
Elon waves the question away with a flick of his paw, chuckling confidently.
He gestures grandly at the rocket again, but the journalists exchange doubtful glances. A low hum begins to emanate from the rocket. A countdown clock appears on a large screen beside it.
Elon looks around at the crowd, beaming with pride.
The camera zooms in on the rocket as the countdown continues. A tiny, worried drip of cheese begins to slide down the side of the rocket, unnoticed by Elon. The crowd starts to murmur, but Elon raises a paw to calm them.
Suddenly, with a loud whoosh, the rocket ignites. The powerful engines roar to life, and the rocket begins to rise off the launchpad—but something is terribly wrong. The heat from the engines begins to melt the cheese faster than anyone could have imagined.
As the rocket climbs higher, streams of melted cheese begin to drip from the launchpad, turning the area into a gooey, sticky mess. The crowd begins to panic as the launchpad is rapidly covered in a cheesy flood. One journalist is seen trying to wipe off a giant cheese splat with their shirt.
The rocket, now several hundred feet in the air, starts to wobble as more cheese oozes from its sides. A loud CRACK sounds from the tail end, and a large chunk of cheese breaks off, falling back to Earth in a plop.
Suddenly, the rocket begins to swerve dangerously. A trail of cheese now follows it in the sky, like a bizarre comet made entirely of dairy products.
The rocket starts descending rapidly, and a cheese explosion erupts from the tail, sending a cloud of dairy into the air. The rocket crashes into the nearby ocean with a massive splash. The crowd is silent, staring at the frothy, cheese-laden waves.
The camera zooms in on Elon, standing on the launchpad, his fur and space suit covered in cheese goo. He stands proud, as though nothing is wrong.
The camera cuts to the devastated launchpad, now a gooey, cheese-covered mess, as a lone pigeon pecks at a leftover chunk of rocket.
FADE OUT.
Phase Two: Elon the Muskrat’s Follow-Up Eco-Rocket Launch
EXT. SPACEPORT - DAY (AGAIN)
The scene opens on the same spaceport, now completely covered in gooey cheese. The ground is a mess, the air smells distinctly of dairy, and the rocket launch pad looks more like a melted fondue party gone wrong. A fresh banner has been hung: “THE NEW FRONTIER OF SPACE: ELON’S CHEESE REVOLUTION, PART 2!”
At the podium, once again stands ELON THE MUSKRAT, now wearing a fresh, cheese-stained space suit and looking remarkably chipper despite the previous disaster.
The crowd looks a little unsure, exchanging worried glances. A few journalists whisper among themselves, already bracing for the worst. Elon, however, is completely unfazed.
A large, oddly shaped rocket is revealed behind him. It’s made entirely of brie cheese—an absurdly large wedge, practically oozing from every angle. The rocket shimmers in the sunlight like an overzealous dairy sculpture.
The camera zooms in on the rocket, a series of small cheese curds falling off as it settles. Elon gives a thumbs-up.
The crowd looks increasingly skeptical, but no one dares interrupt. One brave journalist raises their hand.
Another journalist pipes up.
The countdown begins again, and this time, the crowd has grown restless. The rocket gleams, dripping just slightly from the base.
Elon looks over the crowd and winks.
The engines roar to life. At first, everything seems fine. The rocket lifts off with a slightly dramatic squeak, but then—suddenly—the unmistakable sound of cheese gurgling and popping fills the air. The brie rocket starts to wobble as cheese begins to bubble from the sides.
The rocket starts to tip dangerously as cheese begins to ooze in great, thick rivers from the base, splattering across the launch pad. A chunk of brie shoots out of the rocket like a cannonball and lands with a splat in the crowd. People scream in a mix of horror and confusion as they scramble to avoid the cheese.
The rocket, now completely unstable, careens into the sky. More cheese rains down like a bizarre meteor shower. The crowd begins to scatter, slipping in cheese goo.
The rocket, now resembling a giant cheese soufflé, begins to spin wildly in the air. It starts to descend rapidly, and the cheese begins to melt in dramatic waves.
The rocket lands with a massive, sticky CRASH, the impact sending a flood of melted brie in every direction. The launch pad is now completely unrecognizable, entirely submerged in cheese. Elon stands triumphant, oblivious to the disaster surrounding him.
The camera pulls back to show the completely destroyed spaceport, as a lone pigeon flaps around, confused by all the dairy.
FADE OUT.
